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Ripken named special envoy by State Department
2007-08-09 18:32
by Bob Timmermann

Cal Ripken was named as a special envoy for the State Department by Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice.

Purportedly, Ripken's job will be to promote baseball around the world, but I've been told by my sources at Foggy Bottom that Ripken is actually on a top secret mission to head off a potential civil war in Andorra.

Comments
2007-08-09 20:03:02
1.   Robert Daeley
Didn't Rice expressed interest in becoming MLB commissioner? I sense a putsch against the Selig administration. ;)
2007-08-09 20:10:19
2.   Bob Timmermann
Rice wants to be the NFL Commissioner. She allegedly used to be a Broncos groupie.
2007-08-09 20:10:48
3.   Andrew Shimmin
Rice's dream job is commissioner of the NFL. Dubya's the one who wants (or wanted) to be the MLB commissioner.
2007-08-09 20:51:02
4.   Robert Daeley
Ah, right, of course. Stand down the troops from red alert.
2007-08-09 21:21:55
5.   Eric Enders
His mission is to find out once and for all who wrote that nasty comment on his brother Billy's bat.
2007-08-09 22:18:14
6.   joejoejoe
OT: The Baltimore Sun ran a great series not long ago about Ripken's business interests in the IronBirds and how the city of Aberdeen is struggling under the terms of the original lease. That deal was negotiated by since outsed local politicians who looked at Cal Ripken more like a kid getting an autograph on a baseball card than elected officials getting a signature on a business deal. Now they are comparing the Ripken family to the Corleone family in Abdereen for their 'It's nothing personal, it's just business.' attitude when it comes to the community that hosts the team. It reminds me of an old 60 Minutes piece on Bud Selig where somebody said if you ask Selig a business question he gives you a baseball answer and if you ask him a baseball question he gives you a business answer. The Ripkens are definitely engaged in America's Pastime in Aberdeen -- making a buck.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/local/bal-te.ha.stadium14jul14,0,2398539.story

2007-08-10 00:37:33
7.   Strike4
No government agency would want Ripken associated with it. Bringing in a person who set a record for consecutive workdays would be like Annakin walking in on the younglings.
2007-08-10 07:30:43
8.   Richard
"Whenever there's a crisis
The President sends his envoy in"

- Warren Zevon

2007-08-10 09:57:56
9.   For The Turnstiles
I wonder if Phil Rizzuto leaked this information to Bob.
2007-08-10 12:09:39
10.   Linkmeister
Not to put too fine a point on it, this seems to be the level of competence at which Rice and her boss excel: designating other people to do things they're incompetent to do themselves.

Next: Jack Welch will be named plenipotentiary negotiator between Iraq's Sunnis and Shiites.

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