Or at least metaphorically, I don't know how to fish. I just go and order fish. I just want to eat today. Mmm... fish...
Nothing interesting will happen in baseball until Monday anyway. Why? Because if I don't notice it, it isn't interesting. It's a proven scientific principle.
The Random Record of the Week will be delayed a day. I know most people can't start their week without reading that. And the next one will involve the Colorado Rockies. So it's bound to be good!
I'll be travelling sans laptop and be in a secret undisclosed location. My cat will be guarding my apartment. Don't get on his bad side.
So the standings will be a couple days out of date. You'll have to figure out on your own just which team in the NL is the worst. The playoff pairings are unlikely to change in the next two days. No one is going to be eliminated. No one is going to clinch a spot.
I went to see the Daytona Cubs at Jackie Robinson Ballpark. They had George Shuba there at the park and reenacted Jackie Robinson rounding the bases (it was his grandson) and then shaking hands with another young white ballplayer as he crossed homeplate. George 'Shotgun' Shuba was the player who shook Jackie Robinson's hand as he crossed homeplate after his first HR for the Montreal Royals. Shuba is now 83.
I'm in Bob's place right now. Rearranging his sock drawer. Next, I'm going to replace all of his plates with smaller, lower-quality plates. Possibly plastic ones.
Now Brock's gone and I've broken into Bob's place. All these copies of "The Baseball Research Journal" are taking up too much space, so I've thrown them out the window.
Oh, and, I'm not sure which, but one of you really needs to change your socks more often.
Now Eric's gone and I've entered Bob's place, though without breaking. I'm taking a sample of the residue in his Jamba Juice cup and having it analyzed to determine his new flavor of choice. I'm told by the lab technicians that they can also determine which "boosts" were in the drink.
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Bob? Bob?!?
Yeah, I have problems telling jokes.
http://www.georgeshuba.com/images/Photo%20Images/Handshake%20Photo1.png
http://www.baseball-reference.com/s/shubage01.shtml
aka Oregon
I'm also stealing his television.
Oh, and, I'm not sure which, but one of you really needs to change your socks more often.
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